Friend of God

So I'm in this crazy mood where I go up and down. I was fine with not getting into grad school, and then I had this dream last night that I he changed his mind and I did get in.
Right now I'm missing the knowing what I'm doing with my life part of being in grad school, more than actually being in grad school. If I end up getting a job where I can arrange it, I might end up taking another stats course. It'll be a lot more fun without the pressure of all the work grad school would be. I could just enjoy learning. So really, grad school isn't my problem.
My problem is that I'm not trusting God, or I'm not giving my whole life to God, or something like that. Or I don't know, maybe I need to change how I see God. I feel like God has some major changes in my relationship coming up, or I'm going through. It's not fun.
So it's like this, I'm supposed to put my life entirely in God's hands, but I'm supposed to keep moving. How in the world am I supposed to do that? What stuff is my responsibility, and what am I supposed to give to God and let him handle it?
So basically I'm not alright, but atleast I'm keeping going to God.
I have no motivation to go out job hunting, I'm sitting still, but it's driving me up the wall. Right now it drives me up the wall, everyone keeps asking me what now? I don't know, and I can't stand it. They're giving me suggestions and just trying to be supportive and I can't handle it. Hopefully I'll settle down soon, and won't be going nuts for long.
So everyone please don't get offended when I don't want to talk, but also please don't stop talking to me.
Maybe I just need a swift kick in the butt to get moving, or maybe I need some time.
At the moment, I'm in the I'll get through this mode. I just remembered something my mom said a bit ago, she told me that she told my dad not to worry, I would do what I need to do. I guess I do go nuts in my head over stuff but eventually I end up doing what I need to do.
Life's just nuts, but I guess if it wasn't it wouldn't be interesting.